And life is still life....

This past week I had my eye treatment which always takes me out of play for a few days. I developed a vascular edema and they treat it by shooting a tiny amount of this drug that actually was created for use with colon cancer but they found collateral uses, one of which is shrinking retinal edemas. After only two doses, the thing has reduced itself so now they stretch it out to six weeks instead of four weeks and see if it will stay reduced even though it isn't getting any medicine. Hope springs....

After each shot in my eyeball, I have fallen into an overly cautious routine of sequestering myself because, a. I feel like crap and my eye hurts, and b. it makes me more aware of my hands so I don't rub the eyeball or keep my hands dirty through careless inattention.

I had an opportunity to housesit and took it.

I truly wonder what it would be like to have had one home and the same routines all these years of my adult life. It is amazing to me that I am in my early sixties, have never had my own home and have moved so many times I've lost count.

I said to myself during this time of isolation --which also becomes a time of introspection between naps--
"What if I never have a home? What if I live like this for the rest of my life?" And I found myself oddly OK with that. The domestic and work routine I have is probably better than about 80% of the third world. My sense of self is entirely internally defined. I'm not hurting any of my kids by having the bits and pieces of life ascribed to different geographical settings.

Is it my first choice? How I'm living now I mean... Heck no. I want what everyone else has. Is it the worst a person could experience? No.

So, with my faith intact, I will suck it up and continue to be disciplined about a path that, I do believe, will lead to more domestic stability and put my life all in one place.

What it does that is good is keep me in touch with just today and no further ahead, or behind. Because of that I feel less constrained to have plans that may or may not be necessary. That is always a good thing.

Life consists of work, eating which involves food preparation and clean  up, staying in touch with friends, enjoying social activites, hygiene and recreational reading, and sleeping, laundry and errands, TV shows and films. That's about as normal as transitory gets. Life, is still life....